Friday, March 31, 2006

Man recuperating on mattress that attacked him..

Original post is from March 29th:

I ordered a new mattress. UPS delivered it. The mattress is in the box in the photo above. It is not a big box -- Rooty would have a hard time fitting in it (photo below).

I don't know how they got the mattress in the box. The box has been sitting on the living room floor for three days. I'm afraid to open it -- afraid it will spring out at me in one big twang!

[And, yes, I know that I have exactly the same carpeting as every Cineplex lobby in North America.]
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Friday, March 31 -- I finally opened the box. As soo as I cut the plastic covering the matress, it started to swell -- they seem to have smashed all of the air out of it, then rolled it up and placed it in that box.

In the picture above, you can see how the mattress is continuing to swell, somewhat unevenly. I put a pair of glasses next to it to give some scale.

It slowly unfolded itself -- about 45 minutes -- there was no dramatic twang! It is about mattress size in the photo above.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's like a regular mattress?
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queen size

Jay Noel said...

Wait a second...how on Earth did they fit a queen sized mattress in a box that small????

If you open that thing, it's going to catapult you over the pond and right into Ben Heller's window.

Could you videotape you opening it, and then we can post them onto google video? I'm sensing something extraordinary's going to happen once you cut even one piece of tape.
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the box weights a ton (I guess because it has a mattress in it!) -- I'm going to open it tomorrow when there is someone else here to sit on the box when I cut it loose (who may be flung into orbit of course) -- next week is Big-Thing Trash Week so I have been in no hurry since I won't take the old mattress out to the curb until the weekend

stan said...

Must be an air mattress, like on a sleep-number bed.
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I just saw an ad for a Sleep Number Bed, I thought "the way things have been going, my number would turn out to be 666."

no, it's a real mattress -- I drug (dragged?) the old one down to the garage this evening, right over the top of that box, I cannot image how they got a mattress in there.

Anonymous said...

Whoa. That's just freaky. I used to work as a safety officer for a mattress factory and some of the accidents I'd seen had me fearing for your safety.
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my head is just full of what kind of accidents could happen at a mattress factory ("Have you seen Joe?" "Oh no! Let's hope we haven't shipped another 'super firm' with a guy inside!")

:P fuzzbox said...

Good thing it didn't have Acme stamped to the box. Or you would have had to cut it and run. Before a Wile E. Coyote disaster ensued.
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It was like a slo-mo Road Runner, it slowly unfolded up over that chair, it would have got the lamp if it had been a little to the left.

Jay Noel said...

Whoa...amazing what these mattress manufacturers can do. I wonder if they employ the same technology with clowns.
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the seem to be able to do it wives, so why not clowns if that's what you're into :)