"What's love got to do with it?"

Photo above -- sometimes the husband simply comes home early.

Sign here Mr. Tupic: Winning the award for stupidest lover ever is Zeljko Tupic, from Belgrade. Nothing too unusual, except that he stuck a pencil inside his penis to keep it stiff during sex. Even after an ambulance had to be called, he did not admit to what he had done until the doctor saw the pencil on an X-ray. The doctor told local reporters: "Tupic said he had no idea there were things like Viagra available but agreed that in future he will try pills before he takes any more chances with pencils." No indication as yet as to where he might stick the pills.

Dear Ricky Revenge: This story flew around the Internet on Valentines Day. If it's not true, it should be.

A Marine stationed in Afghanistan recently received a "Dear John" letter from his girlfriend back home. It read as follows:

Dear Ricky, I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice, since you've been gone, and it's not fair to either of us. I'm sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent to you. Love, Becky

Following is Ricky's reply. He included 57 photographs in the envelop.

Dear Becky, I'm so sorry, but I can't quite remember who you are. Please take your picture from the pile, and send the rest back to me. Take Care, Ricky