Thursday, November 16, 2006

Local Traffic Only

This will only interest the folks in the St. Louis area (and then probably only marginally).

The Missouri Highway Department (MODOT) is going to close the busiest freeway into St. Louis for up to three years while they rebuild it (from three lanes in each direction to three lanes in each direction (yes, you read that correctly).

Almost all of the area's major tourist attractions are located along the highway -- the Zoo, the Science Center, the Art Museum, plus Washington University and Barnes, Jewish, and Children's Hospitals.

The highway also connects the wealthy western suburbs with downtown St. Louis.

MODOT wants us all to call the road I-64 -- but almost everyone calls it Highway 40 -- a few call holdouts still call it "the Express Highway" -- and only one or two holdouts call it by its formal name: "The Redbird Expressway."

The St. Louis Post Dispatch website asked readers to submit Top Ten Lists: "The top 10 reasons to rebuild Highway 40" -- so I did. Mine was #51 and is below:
The top 10 reasons to rebuild Highway 40
10. Science Center will be forced to show Omnimax porn to attract enough visitors.
9. Zoo animals will get first good night’s sleep ever.
8. Unable to reach most of the City, Channel 2 can just make up the news.
7. MODOT finds missing World’s Fair Ferris Wheel buried under Clayton Ave. exit, mistakes it for a really big nickel.
6. To keep the ER busy, Barnes will sponsor naked hockey at Steinberg Rink.
5. Work on 40 justifies extending dead-end center lane on eastbound 44 so it dead ends closer to downtown.
4. Unable to reach Busch, Cardinal players can sign with River City Rascals. LaRussa will be happy to be closer to LA.
3. Vandeventer Overpass will make a fine place for a picnic.
2. One more excuse for not going to the Galleria now that the Famous is, you know, a Macy’s.
And, the Number One reason to rebuild Highway 40:
1. Worth a billion dollars just to get people to call it Interstate 64.

1 comment:

Bruce said...

I feel really bad for the people in that area. It's going to be an even bigger clusterf**k than before. Maybe I should wait until 2009 or 2010 to go back to St. Louis..
little noticed is MODOT's plan to "restrip" I-70 and I-44 to add one extra lane in each direction to each -- How! -- unless they make really, really narrow lanes or use the shoulders