Two 500 Thread Count Sheets to the Wind

I went to buy sheets this morning. The last time that I bought sheets I had my choice among several attractive decorator colors of sheets. This time I had my choice among several endless aisles of sheets -- there were more types of sheets than General Motors has models of cars.

The big issue in sheets appears to be "thread count," with price rising geometrically as thread count increases. I assume any sheet with a thread count above 1500 would be both luxurious and bullet-proof.

So, clueless about the cornucopia of cloth that confronted me, I did what any guy would do, I left and went to Sears and looked at lawnmowers.