Thursday, February 08, 2007

Random Mark Twain Quotes

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.

Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.

Golf is a good walk spoiled.

It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native criminal class except Congress.

I admire him [Cecil Phodes], I frankly confess it; and when his time comes I shall buy a piece of the rope for a keepsake.


The Phoenix said...

One of my all-time favorites was: I never let my schooling get in the way of my education.

I had a sign up of that in my classroom.

:P fuzzbox said...

Yeah, I am all for good company.

Pixie said...

Denial ain't just a river in Egypt
I hear this all the time and I never knew it was a MT quote.

David Amulet said...

Another couple of my favorites of Mr Clemens are something like:

"The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them."

"I would have written you a shorter letter but I didn’t have the time."

-- david

Jim said...

foenix, fuzz, pix, da -- thanks for the comments --

"mark twain" is what the guy with the rope on the front of the riverboat yelled out when the river was two fathoms (12 ft, approximately 3.7 m) or "safe water" -- "twain" is an archaic/old-English term for two

sleepyrn said...

How about:

"Be respectful of your superiors, if you have any."


"The human race consists of the damned and the ought-to-be damned."