Pass the test, and die.

The Missouri Drivers License Manual says that the chevron sign at the top is the same as the arrow sign below it. Chevron signs can be used in place of the arrow signs or mixed with them. Both signs would appear to mean Keep Right or Road Curves to Right. The chevron sign in the photo below (one in a series), however, would appear to mean Drive Into Ditch or Hit Electric Pole.

I can see clearly now, the kook has gone...

had to go to eye-glasses place today to pick up some lenses.

thirty-something woman beat me to the door.

25 minutes later she was still arguing with the woman at the counter.

annoying woman had had her eyes examined and was given 'temporary' contact lenses.

she was supposed to come back a week later to see how the 'temporary' lenses had worked and to order regular contact lenses.

they called to remind her.

she dropped by today to pick up more 'temporary' lenses, having never returned for the week-later visit.

oh, did I forget to mention that her initial visit was in January.

that's right, ten months later she shows back up, and wanted freebies.

she was told that she would have to have her eyes reexamined before a prescription could be written because it had been more than three months, for another $65 dollars, or she could wait until January 2007 when her insurance would pay for an annual exam.

no, she could not wait -- because her husband likes her in contacts.

no, the 10-month delay was not her fault because she has three kids and they keep her so busy she had no time for herself (she had no kids with her, they were in school).

note that, in effect, she was saying that she did not have time to visit the optometrist during the past ten months because ten years ago neither she nor her husband could follow the instructions on a box of condoms.

The sun never sits on silly!

Many news sites group humorous stories under banners such as Oddly Enough or Strange News of of Day. These are usually fun to read, and I've based many post on them over the years.

On the other hand, you can also go to any British news site and usually find even odder stories mixed in with the regular news. Today, I went to the Daily Mail site:

Could age laws spell the end for office birthday cards? -- Workers have been warned against circulating or signing 'ageist' greeting cards that make light-hearted references to age, such as being over the hill. So much for the classic "You're not getting better you're getting older." "Under rules that came into force this month, staff can take legal action if they feel they have been harassed or victimised due to their age." Or, they could just take the stick out of their collective butt and be grateful someone remembered their birthdays.

Is this 27-year-old cat Britain's oldest moggy? [A moggy is a cat, especially of mixed breed] -- The kitty, Bungalow Bill, was found by Dorothy as a stray in 1980. When Dorothy died 15 years later, BB went to live with her sister Ruby. When Ruby died four years after that, BB went to live with Ruby's son John. Am I the only one who thinks this cat might be a jinx?

Dog eats dead master and his wife -- The dog ate two people, not it's own doggie wife.

Ritual Routine

Do you put your house to bed at night?
And wake it up in the morning?

Rooty and I spent a few days with someone who has a well-established procedure for closing down the house at night and waking it up in the morning.

Night:
Empty wastebaskets from all rooms, in specific order, and take outside to the trash.
Dogs get late night treat.
Dogs go outside.
Furnace/AC is reset for night.
All storm doors are locked (deadbolts) in specific order.
All outside doors are locked in specific order.
All blinds are closed in specific order.
All draperies are closed in specific order.
Some TV's turned off, others turned on, in specific order.
Security system turned on, outside lights turned off.
Table lamps turned off room by room, in specific order.
All doors are rechecked, in specific order.
Ceiling lights in hallway turned off.

Morning:
Draperies opened, specific order.
Blinds opened, specific order.
Exterior doors opened specific order.
Family room TV turned on.
Security system turned off (so dogs can go out).
Everyone has peach juice for breakfast.

My routine at home is a little different.

Night:
When I get tired, I go to bed.

Morning:
When I get up, I turn off all of the lights and TV's that I left on when I went to bed the night before.

You should see the photo of the first-lady...

This guy is running for President of Catalonia.

The headline on the AP article is The Naked Truth. (CBS)

Albert Rivera's running for office because he feels the current politicians are not addressing serious issues.

Mark Foley has endorsed Albert's candidacy,and sent an email saying he's behind him 100 percent.

Just when you thought enough was enough...

Members of the Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka, Kansas, best know for their protests at military funerals of GI's killed in Iraq, announced they were planning to protest at the funerals of the Amish schoolgirls shot to death in Lancaster, Pennsylvania, earlier this week. It seems Ed Rendell, governor of Pennsylvania has angered the group by calling them "insane" for protesting at the funerals of US soldiers who have died in combat in Iraq. From the church's website: "We are continuing to pray for even worse punishment upon Pennsylvania.

Fox News offered a hour of national airtime in exchange for not protesting, which the church accepted: "The Westboro Baptist Church planned to protest the funerals of the Amish school children. Shirley Phelps-Roper and Mike have agreed that the church will not protest at the funerals in exchange for an hour of airtime. It happens today on the Mike Gallagher Show." FOX

The governor had a more direct approach in mind -- he planned on sending in enough state police to ensure that the funerals were not disrupted.

So, you think your life's dull? Amateur!

I watched an hour-long special this evening on the History Channel about the history of glue.

I win.

How old were you, and was it legal?

It really depends upon where you were, your age, and sometimes the other person's age.

Here is a chart showing the worldwide ages of consent by country and state

If there are two numbers listed -- 14/18 -- the first number usually refers to persons very close in age, the second if there is a big age difference or the other person is over 21 (it varies by state)

When I was 12 I couldn't find my way home from school by myself much less be needing a condom!

Something for Florida Congressman Mark Foley (R)

These are the two statutes that stood on either side of Hitler's Reich Chancellery.

It's like walking and chewing gum...

driving and eating at the same time,

doing homework and watching the TV --

the mailman in Alton (here in Madison County) was arrested today for selling marijuana from his postal truck while delivering mail, for the past two years.